What Makes a Happy Relationship?(emphasis on the question mark)

I don’t know. Blog post done. Honestly I don’t think there’s one definitive answer to this question but I’ll give it a stab. I’ve been lucky enough to date some amazing women that I think are truly great people. Obviously I don’t have all the answers or I wouldn’t be talking about those in the past tense. I do think there are certain characteristics that make a happy relationship.

One thing that’s probably very obvious is compatibility. I think the big areas have to be compatible. This doesn’t mean if one person loves going to museums or likes pottery class and the other doesn’t, that you’re not compatible. I mean in things that are important like how you communicate, what you want in life, and of course sex.

If one person is verbally very expressive and needs a lot of affirmation, then that’s way different from a person that only shows affection through actions. Neither one is good or bad, just different. This is an area people have to be fairly similar. One person might need to hear how beautiful they are every day, while the other cares more about physical affection or small thoughtful actions. If you’re on complete opposite spectrums it’s going to be very hard.

Same thing with sex. Some people think having sex 1-3 times per week is more than enough (I’ll never understand those people but that’s a whole different topic). Others might want to have sex 1-2 a day to be satisfied. If you date someone who has a low sex drive and yours is super high then that’s going to be very hard. It might lead to both of you being sexually frustrated all the time and if your sex life isn’t happy then usually the relationship isn’t either. Personally I also think life’s way too short to be sexually frustrated and not be with someone that’s compatible in that way.

Wanting the same things in life and in the future is the third thing I think is very important. One person’s ideal life is a quiet suburban life with a white picket fence and going to soccer every Sunday with their 2 kids. The other wants to travel around the world with their partner, not have any kids, and doesn’t want to live in the same place forever. If two people are that opposite in what they want in the future then they definitely have an expiration date.

Obviously there’s much more that goes into relationships. Having similar passions and interests obviously matter. But if those three big things aren’t compatible at all then it’ll be an uphill battle. People can change of course, but usually not a lot. If you like having sex once a week and that’s it, you’re likely not going to change into someone who likes to have sex 10 times in one day(some people would call that a sex addiction, don’t worry I won’t). Vice versa the same thing. That’s why these things are important to find out in the early stages of dating, because once you’re in love you’re usually going to at least try to make it work even if it probably won’t.

Should you have a plan B?

Don’t worry, this isn’t a post about birth control. That’s not the plan I’m talking about. This is the back up plan that people always have for their A plan or their dream. This is always something that people think about and most advise others to have a backup plan. The reasoning is that if you go after that one thing and it fails, then you might not have anything left to fall back on. Because of this many people choose the safe option which is leaving all options open and considering all of them. This is not the path to success usually.

Most people I know and probably most people you know always have a plan b, c, d, e, maybe even all the way to z depending on how careful of a person they are. Do most people pursue their dream or take risks? I think you know the answer to that.

The People You Surround Yourself With

I was just recently reminded again how important it is to surround yourself with the right people. I’m sure most people have heard of the saying,”You’re the average of the 5 people you surround yourself with most.” In the book “Think and Grow Rich” by Napoleon Hill he actually talks about a Mastermind Group. What this basically means is surrounding yourself with like-minded people, people with the same drives as you, people who are going the same direction as you are.

In his book he actually states that this is one of the most important things in being successful. This actually makes a lot of sense if you think about it, since all of us are to a large degree a product of our environment.

Why Does School Make Learning So Boring?

It’s a tragedy that school is so BORING. Learning should be fun, but most of the time it feels like schools and universities are trying everything in their power to make it as dull as possible.

It’s really a shame that when most graduate college they say things like “Finally! I never have to study again.” When really, learning should be a life long passion.

Many of our infamous generation Y barely ever read books. Even though there are so many benefits to reading. You don’t have to read anything serious either. It can be anything really, like Game of Thrones or The Hunger Games. (As long as you don’t read 50 Shades of Grey we’ll be cool)

Lessons learned from Richard Branson’s: Losing My Virginity

One of the more interesting autobiographies I have read in a long time is Richard Branson’s story. Talk about coming up in a non-traditional way. What I admire most about him is that he didn’t start with much money at all, everything he’s accomplished he created himself. Starting with his magazine at age 17, owning 18 record stores at age 21, to the billion dollar empire that Virgin is now, he has had a very impressive career.

One of his famous mottos

Two things that stuck out for me were how many times he actually failed and how close he was to failing many times more. The other thing that I noticed is